Ok, I think I pretty well described what I'm going through, what my mid-life crisis is. Maybe not all the details, but I think you get the gist. So today I am going to try to tackle the "Toddler/Adolescence" piece. This also answers the question of why I don't think "mid-life crisis" is an apt name for what people go through.
Through my studies of brain development, particularly child and adolescent brain development, I have learned that toddlers and adolescents are very similar. Particularly, how their brains are working in that stage of life. Both ages are points of major transition. Toddlers are transitioning from babys to kids. Adolescents are transitioning from kids to adults. With major shifts like that the brain is doing some serious overtime work of creating new neural pathways. Or, in some cases breaking old ones before creating new ones. I know my science lingo might be off, but I know my ideas are correct. Toddlers and adolescence are my two favorite ages. I LOVE them! The are so vibrant, entertaining, curious, and just plain fascinating. Everything is new again. Suddenly they have completely new eyes with which they are seeing everything from new perspectives. Both ages are so important in that guided in the right or wrong direction the age can be a serious turning point for bad or good. And, of course, both ages are very difficult, for themselves and others. Of course it is hard and crazy when your brain is going through so much at once. It's confusing to say the least. And, of course, adolescents have to deal with those pesky horomones as well. Maybe toddlers do to, I'm not sure.
At those transition ages we need to question authority, test boundaries, and assert independence as part of our new learning and growing. Our emotions are very raw and come to the surface more easily (toddler temper tantrums/adolescent "dragons"). But those ages are also very rich. Some of our most meaningful and deep experiences happen at these ages. Though we may remember the adolescent experiences better than the toddler ones, they both have lasting effects on our lives.
So, what I'm wondering is...is the so called "mid-life crisis" the third tier in this transition hierarchy? Maybe there are four tiers. Baby to Kid, Kid to Early Adult, Novice Adult to Adult, and Adult to Elderly? As I have talked about what is going on with me with some of my older friends, many of them have said they had this experience multiple times, not just once. And, they didn't necessarily call any of them a mid-life crisis. It's not a crisis, it's just another transition in life.
I see what I am going through as another adolescence. All of a sudden I feel emotion in this extreme, ridiculous way that teens do. I'm going back to fundamental identity and spiritual and meaning of life questions that I thought I left behind after adolescence. I have a strange, nagging desire to rebel. And, my hormones are out of wack again. I'm seeing the world in a new way and mourning the loss of my old perspective and way of living. Isn't that almost identical to what we go through in our teens?
Anyway, just some thoughts. There is more to say about this novice adult transition. I think that is what I am going to call it now instead of mid-life crisis. It doesn't have to be a crisis. But, that's all for now.
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